Call me apocalyptic, but department stores in Port-au-Prince are destined for an aisle Haitian.
Someone who gets crushed to death shopping on Black Friday, aka a Walmartyr.
Black Friday ads always a sale me.
Which fish is easily scanned at checkout aisles? The barracoda.
In Soviet Russia, they didn’t have Black Friday, but they had Siberia Monday.
Which Chinese leader always finished his holiday purchases early? Deng Xiaoping.
The supermarket checkout girl accused me of being a spam-bought.
Paleoanthropologists recently discovered the fossilized remains of primitive ‘bargain hunters’. They’ve named them the Costcolopithecus.
I bought a faulty bamboo toboggan from a panda. The panda ripped me off. Now I feel bamboosled.
Whenever we enter a street market, I tell my wife, “Watch out, things are gonna get haggley.”