Anyone who licks an envelope is into mail bondage.
When the B-52 bomber pilot got divorced, he had to pay loads.
Which actor wears a toupee? Harrison Ford.
Shed that extra 20 pounds? Weigh to go!
I was on YouTube trying to download ‘Fat Elvis’ videos but it takes up too much band width.
Did you hear George Michael jumped ship to join a hair-metal band? It’s like Wham! to the Slaughter.
Do overprivileged children go online for their social networthing?
Tricked into watching Happy Days, I fell victim to a Fonzi Scheme.
Do punsters enjoy slicing up rump roast?
You butcher ass!
Lettuce hope that when vegetables attack, it won’t be a large kale invasion.


