THE SLURPER BOWL

Dear Pun Gents, my co-ed football team is trying to think of a name with a sexual pun to it. That’s what the captain wants.  Something where Will Ferrell would say haha. ~Olivia, Fayetteville, NC

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Tight Ends [too obvious]
  2. Poonters
  3. Hut Slots
  4. We Touch Down There
  5. No Cuddle Offense
  6. Line of Rimmage
  7. Third and Long
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OPUN HOUSE

Dear Pun Gents, I’m doing a web guide for students attending a university open day, and need a pun. Help. ~Wallace, Sunderland

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Welcome, academian nuts
  2. It’s not tour early to sign up
  3. We got Guides and Dolls.
  4. A day of dancing and parentsing
  5. Check our smoking hot class
  6. You can’t spell education without ‘ducat’ – get your tickets here.
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (5 votes, average: 3.20 out of 5)
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ROLLING IN DOHA

Dear Pun Gents, I need a name for a bowling team at work. We are a drilling team that drill gas wells offshore. ~CD, Doha, Qatar

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Rolling in Doha
  2. The Qataracts: We Strike You Blind
  3. The Drillionaires
  4. Offshore Things
  5. The Spillage People
  6. Power Ball Lads
  7. A Spare a Gas
  8. Gas Spare Tame? [yikes]
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (9 votes, average: 3.56 out of 5)
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CORNEA JOKES

Dear Pun Gents, I am an optometry student and I’m looking for a pun theme for our fancy annual party called ‘Eyeball’ (e.g. eyeland of enchantment, apple of my eye). Thank you! ~Sarah, St. Louis, MO

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. This Ball is Ophthal Wall
  2. Tropical Eye Lens Theme
  3. Under the See
  4. Naughty Pupils
  5. Myopium
  6. A Blinkin’
  7. Dilate M for Murder
  8. The Glauc of the Irish
  9. Smooth Lacrimals
  10. Lasik Sunday
  11. Macula Conception
  12. Nystag Party
  13. Vitreous is Sweet
  14. Get in the Zonule
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WE MAKE PUNS ON COMMANDO

Dear Pun Gents, we have a group of 10 girls running a 5K race that has different obstacles and free beer at the end, and we’d love your help with our team name. The event is called Go Commando 5K. ~Laura, St. Paul, MN

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. The 10 Commandoments
  2. Girls Run Wild
  3. Shoed to Kill
  4. The Obstacle Chorus
  5. Commando 5k – The Free Beards for Free Beer
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OH MAG GOT!

Dear Pun Gents, this is for a project: I need fly-related puns. The names of the flies have to be incorporated with the puns.
Thank you! ~Sou, Seattle

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Yawn. Reading about flies all night makes me a bit drosophila.
  2. The fly diptera foot in the water.
  3. The buzz of a fly is muscidae to my ears!
  4. Horseflies make us stupid. They want tabanideas.
  5. Mayflies may not – which makes them easy to kill.
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YOU SUCKAGAWAEA

Dear Pun Gents, a pun about Lewis & Clark. ~Sophia, Toronto

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. As explorers, they must have got tired. After I while I bet they were just searching for the Northwest Massage.
  2. How did Lewis insult Clark? “You Suckagawaea!”
  3. Their obsession with reaching the west coast aka a Pacifixation.
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (15 votes, average: 2.87 out of 5)
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DEUCE LOOKS LIKE A LADY

Dear Pun Gents, help! We need a clever new name for our ladies seniors 4.0 USTA tennis team. We play at an indoor facility called Sound Shore Tennis. Thanks! ~Carol, Rye, NY

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Court Chesters [for Sound Shore in Port Chester NY]
  2. Unforced Heiress
  3. Top Seed Turvy
  4. Line Judge Judies
  5. Shore Things
  6. Groundmothers
  7. Gram Slams
  8. Baby Got Backswing
  9. Serve me a Double
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THE APE TEAM

Dear Pun Gents, we need a team name for an amazing race type event, called Gorilla Challenge. We are a group of four friends: two guys and two girls. Thanks! ~Seth, Magnolia, TX (long-time fan)

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Hot Gorillas Rule
  2. The Ape Team
  3. The Monkeys
  4. Orangu Crush
  5. We’re Bringing Silver Back
  6. It’s Good-All Good
  7. Banana Republicans
  8. The Panzees
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (4 votes, average: 3.25 out of 5)
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JOURNAL OF APPLED SCIENCE

Dear Pun Gents, I am writing a scientific paper, and the titles of such papers are often puns. The topic of the paper is looking at fruit and seeing whether the phylogenetic trees you can construct based on morphological features match the known trees for these fruit. ~Alex, London, UK

AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:

  1. Fruit 66: A phylogenetic roadmap
  2. There a Pears to be a Connection…
  3. Appled Science
  4. Phylogenetic Trees Arboring?
  5. Peach de Resistance
  6. A Theory with many Applecations
  7. A Branch of Theory that Bears Fruit
TerriblePretty BadOKPretty GoodHilarious (8 votes, average: 4.88 out of 5)
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