The people of Helsinki have never been a fan of Schubert’s UnFinnish Symphony.
Chimneys make Santa Claustrophobic.
Which animal is hardest to milk?
The drama dairy.
I could never live in a society run by grizzlies. Way too much bearocracy.
The Wedding at Cana proved that Jesus was a wine/eau.
NED: Joe Malignant is no longer my friend.
ED: Why not?
NED: Because – he’s always spreading tumours about me!
Cell biologists are afraid of falling into debt. They’re might-owe-chondriacs.
The rich but deranged warlord kept a harem of midget concubines who slept outside. Clearly this was a man of imp whore tents.
To make a call, quadruple amputees have to rely on their dictaphone.
Indian restaurant at the Athens Acropolis: aka The Part the Naan.


