What is a dermatologist’s favourite holiday season? A: Eczemas.
holidays
Today marks the first time we ever May Day pun.
What should you give a ghost for Christmas?
Presence.
Today is the best day of the year to lose weight, because it’s X-mass!
My friend Ian has a hollow leg. Happy Hollow Ian!
Someone who gets run over at a Black Friday sale: Wal-Martyr.
This year is the New Year. Last year was the Knew Year.
Don’t forget to commemorate Penis Re-Attachment Month, aka Nomember.
I invested in potatoes, because someone said I’d be Dublin my fortune. So Irished everything I had.
In the days leading up to Christmas, people in San Francisco did everything they could to avoid the mauls, as they were a real zoo. The only people who weren’t worried were lawyers with an escape claws.


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