Someone stole your deodorant? You’ve been reek rolled!
hygiene
There’s an old proverb that recommends against circumcision: Spear the rod, spoil the child.
Staining your drawers is one way to show someone you love your undie-dyeing devotion.
I wasted millions inventing the Sleeveless Mouthwash: it was a foolish in-vest mint.
I told my oral hygiene professional that I wash my mouth with plaque. He looked at me like I was dentally retartared.
Did Jesus ever get a haircut?
Yes, He said “Render unto scissor what belongs to scissors!” So it is proven that Jesus shaves.
Careful – if you kiss an Irish rock star, you might get Bono.
Who was the dirtiest mobster? Tony Soap ran out.
Anyone who collects pimples is array cyst.
Just before getting married, women may ask their fiancés to get a preen-up.

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