Mr. T is getting incontinent in his old age. He was recently heard to boast, “I shitty the pool.“
What did Archimedes’ wife say to him before he took his bath?
What Yoda said when Jerry Maguire told him a joke:
“Shows me the pun, he.”
When Sartre was forced to explain e-commerce to a cow, he remarked “Hell is udder Paypal.”
Darth Vader threw a root vegetable at his son’s car. He said ‘Luke, I yam your four-door!’
Holmes and Watson went to a vegan restaurant that served only tree dishes. Watson asked Holmes how he would order. Sherlock replied “Elm entree, my dear.”
Caesar accused Brutus of cannibalism. “Ate dudes, Bruté?”
Wide men can’t jump.
When the rain fell on our heads it was like glorious piss. So I quoted Shakespeare, saying “The sky is a most excellent can o’ pee.”