I always get sick when my cousin Enza comes to visit. Last week, in flew Enza, and wouldn’t you know.
(2 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)
Loading... (2 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)Loading...medicine
(2 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)Loading...I swallowed a large pair of earrings. Can the doctors remove them? I remain hoopful.
(3 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)Loading...What do gynecologists have in common with Christopher Columbus? They are all explore-hers.
(3 votes, average: 1.67 out of 5)Loading...I wish I could cure a global pandemic. But that’s outside my sphere of influenza.
(1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)Loading...Pathologists always get the coroner office.
(Rate This Pun)Loading...PAIN IT FORWARD
Dear Pun Gents,
we need pain medicine puns for a 5k. We are a team of emergency room staff. Our team name is the “painkillers” and we need individual names for shirts. ~Katie, Centreville, VA
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- Aspirin’ Runner (aspiring)
- Anal Geezer (analgesia)
- Nocicery Evil (nociception)
- Pain My Dues
- Pain it Forward
- Paindemonium
- The Advillain
- The Big Hurt
- Ow! Capone
- MethaDon Corleone
-
The Great Codeini [Houdini]
-
CelebrexStreet Boys
-
Darva
-
Ty Leno [Jay Leno?]
-
ASAtronaut
-
The Aceto Men
[General ER names]
- Public Anemia
- Kool CAT
- Electro Cardio Grandma
- Where’s WalDOA
- Done Like DNR
- Auntie EMs
- Pepe Dural
- First Degree Bernie
- Hemmor Reggie
- Poison IVey
- Meddy Vedder
- The Virgin MRI
- ODie
- Perry Cardial
- Sally Saline
- Shockille O’Neal
(6 votes, average: 2.83 out of 5)Loading...CAN SOAR SOCIETY
Dear Pun Gents, we need a name for our Relay for Life team. We are a group of young survivors and need something great. There are a lot of names like Fight til it’s Right or Fight Through the Night. We want something original. Please help us. ~Amy, Hannibal, MO
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- Can Soar Society
- The Beat It Dudes
- See You in Health
- Chemochameleons
- Remission Accomplished
(9 votes, average: 4.22 out of 5)Loading...What did the out-of-work doctor say?
“Patients is a virtue!”
(1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)Loading...Medicine Puns
Which doctors are the best interior decorators? Room-atologists!
When do some doctors talk about the weather? Whenever they meet a urologist.
Gastroenterologists always lose at scrabble because they get stuck with all the bowels.
The cancer specialist never gets to sleep, because he’s an on-col-ogist.
Surprised at the number of doctors who were murdered in 2004? Not at all, we’ve been expecting the surgeon homicides!
Is Valium still effective at high altitudes?
Which comedian will donate his bones to science? Red Skelton.
Hospitals approve of which musical sandwiches? Organ donairs.
Which doctors don’t drive Beemers? The Audi-ologists!
Anal fissures? Let’s hope the ER has a crack team!
Why did the Spanish Inquisition punish unbelievers by forcing them to drink coffee? Because caffeine is a die-heretic!
Did you hear about the red-nosed doctor who prescribed beer for every alement?
Did you hear that Coca-cola has finally hired a staff fizzician?
The war hero went to an animal hospital; he insisted on seeing a veteranarian.
Which drug has puzzling side effects? Ritalin
Why does the ophthalmologist prescribe selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors? Because it’s his job to assess our eyes! (SSRIs)
The patient was dogged by shitzuphrenia.
Which nerve is responsible for massive erections? The crane-ial.
Who never interrupts? An in-turn!
Who specializes in men’s necks? The guy-neck-ologist!
Ed: “Did you know the author of ‘The Raven’ died from an avoidable case of malnutrition?”
Ned: “Tragic. Would he have been saved by a nutritionist, perhaps?”
Ed: “No, although a foot doctor could have helped.”
Ned: “Really?
Ed: “Yes, Edgar Allen needed a Poe Dietrist!”
The doctor had to paint Easter eggs before making his dye-egg-nosis.
The raggedy sponge toy had a simple case of frayed nerfs.
Which STD is terminal? Goner-rhea!
The stunt pilot could no longer perform aerial tricks after being diagnosed with loopus.
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