We only do portmanteau puns on Valentine’s Day. Because love is blend.
valentine’s day
Deer Valentine: today, let’s have a hart to hart. I’ll spend lots of doe on you, and we can have some fawn.
No flights to France will be delayed. It’s Gaul on time’s Day!
What does an archer send his ex-lover on Valentine’s Day? A: Arrows.
This Valentine’s Day I’m going to swipe right on my Friendster profile. Oops, did I just date myself?
All the best Valentine’s gifts are made of wooed.
WHO’S YO RATTY?
Dear Pun Gents, I’m having a meeting to discuss the analysis of mouse mating-calls. The meeting is on Valentine’s Day. Any quirky pun suggestions? ~Emma
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- It’s been mice talking to ya!
- Show me your titmouse.
- Who’s yo’ Ratty?
- Bred anything interesting lately?
- I think I’m in lab with you!
- I find you so infestinating!
- Happy Valen-tiny Rodent Day
- I’ve got my ides on you.
- USV happy to see me! (USV = ultrasonic vocalizations, which is how mice communicate)
- The female mouse fell in love with male mouse once she saw the size of his black six.
- Which mice make good prostitutes? The ones with the mus sells.
JUNG AT HEART
Dear Pun Gents, got any ideas on how to incorporate psychology vocabulary with Valentine’s Day? It can be a person, a theory, a perspective, anything. Thanks so much! ~Victoria, New York City
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- I’m no longer a Freud of love
- Maslow dance with me? You’re at the top of my hierarchy of needs.
- I need multi-moanal therapy
- Don’t you love when a secret Myers Briggs you flowers?
- You’re the narcissed person I know
- Let’s Roschach up
- Are you into DS&M?
SMILE FOR THE PHOTON
Dear Pun Gents, my AP physics teacher is getting married, and she wants our class to come up with (cheesy) physics puns to put on little Valentine hearts that will be on display at the wedding. The pun has to be romantic and include physics. Example: I’m falling for you, at 9.8m/s^2! Thanks so much! ~Ryan, Palatine
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- It Hertz to be apart
- You’re my favourite Galileo
- I quanta be with you
- Your quarks are so charming
- Love is Vectorious
- Our love is a universal constant
YOU’RE SUCH A GREAT POISON
Dear Pun Gents, I need a good Valentine’s pun that has to do with spiders. Something original (nothing about a love bug please!) and punny. And nothing that says ‘I love you’ in it. Thanks. ~Tori, Seattle, WA
AS THE PUN GENTS SEE IT:
- Happy Venomtine’s Day – You’re such a wonderful poison
- Can you believe we met on the web?
- [Black widow to mate]: I met my last husband on the web
- When I saw your legs – I eight them up
- How time flies [fly stuck on spiderweb]
- Weave come a long way.